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The Butcher Came from Texas and Pork Chops Were on the Menu |
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East Tawas, Michigan. (August 18, 2003) Keith Zars and crew
from San Antonio, Texas, sailed their J/22 Pork U to
victory this weekend at the 2003 J/22 Eastern Great Lakes
Championship presented by Mannington Mills. After barely making
the regatta USA 572 won three out of six races to win this year's
regatta by 5 points.
Each year our little Pig Fleet (J/22 Fleet #44) hosts a regatta
and tries to get sailors from around the area to attend. We aim
to please with an atmosphere more geared to having fun that
anything. Don't get me wrong, the racing is great, but so are the
parties and the camaraderie of all your chums in one truly
beautiful setting.
As I write this it is Sunday night; I am at home after spending
the weekend on a race committee boat. I am tired! I am sitting
in front of this computer trying to put together some words to
describe what happened this weekend. My nose is sun burnt, my
face hurts from laughing and smiling and my hip is bruised from a
port/starboard altercation with Tim Finkle Saturday night in the
bar at Tawas Bay Yacht Club. I guess the best way to describe the
weekend is: "Boy it sure was good to see all of our friends
together and man, that was fun!"
Thursday night the east coast of the U.S.A. was in a panic because
of an energy blackout. I arrived early on Friday at the yacht
club in East Tawas, Michigan to get ready for the boats that would
be arriving that afternoon. As I talked with some of my fellow
fleet members we became worried that the boats that were coming
from Cleveland, Toronto, and Youngstown would not be able to find
gas and would have to miss the racing. Our next thoughts turned
to the Zars and we were hoping somehow their flights would all
make it on time and they would show up to sail. Well, in Tawas
things always seem to work out and we got our first bit of good
news when our pal Janene Marasciullo from Annapolis called and
said that her flight will be in, just a few hours late. Pretty
soon we had news that most of the expected group was indeed going
to make it and all were safe. Most folks made it in before too
late in the evening and we made camp for those folks who needed it
and drinks for those who needed it!
As is tradition, we do not start racing on Saturday until 12:30pm.
Hey, this is Tawas, we have wind! Friday is a big social event
with the competition at the bar as fierce as the sailing. There
was a bonfire outside with a few sailors chilling out after their
long drive and there was a wildfire inside the bar! Loud laughter
could be heard throughout the club until our sweetheart bartender,
Debbie, saved us all a long slow death and called "Last Call!"
Jennifer said we made it to bed around 3:00am and there were still
10 or so people still finishing up!
Saturday morning came, not to early. Registration was held from
9:00am-11:00am. We held a small welcome ceremony and skipper's
meeting rolled into one at 11:30am and then the racing began.
As is also tradition on Tawas Bay, it was 85 degrees out and
blowing between 12-16 knots! Beautiful clear sky and no waves.
The first race got off on time; it and all the races were five
legged windward/leewards. The boys on Pork U must have
been tired, but they led around the course most of the race,
followed by Chris Doyle and team on The Other White Meat
(USA 1026). Pretty intense battle ensued but the Zars were able
to hold on win the race followed by USA 1026 and Kevin Doyle/Vic
Snyder on Mo' Bacon (USA 489), Peter U on I'd Rather
be a Pig (USA 1487), and Jim Andraitis on Bacon
Beater.
Race two was also perfect wind, sun, and lack of waves. This time
USA 489 got out on the fleet and really pulled away. They led
wire-to-wire to the finish and were followed by Tim Finkle/Morgan
Paxhia/Matt Kastan on Little Jerry Swinefeld (USA 1532)
in third was USA 1026, fourth was USA 572 and fifth went to Bruce
Scott/Dave Kupas/Andrew (FDB) Riem on Hog Wash (CAN 383).
Race three was beautiful clear skies, a nice 12 -15 knots of
breeze, and no waves. Do you see a pattern here? This race was
all about nothing. Little Jerry Swinefeld showed his
legs early in the race and was being hounded around the course by
Pork U. The boys did a fine job and took the win
followed by Pork U in second, third was Mo'
Bacon, fourth went to The Other White Meat, and
fifth place was I'd Rather be a Pig.
It is now pushing 4:00pm and everyone is looking tired, but it is
too nice of a day to send them in just yet! Our stellar race
committee chairman, John McCree, sets one more race course to
finish the day sailing four races. Great races up to this point,
we have had three races with three different winners. What you
might ask happened in race four? A fourth different winner! It's
true! The Other White Meat can't be called chicken,
after overtaking Pork U on the upper third of the final
beat of the day to win the fourth race. What a great battle to
watch. Pork U finished second followed closely by
Little Jerry Swinefeld, Mo' Bacon, and Bacon
Beater.
After racing the participants joined the members of TBYC up at the
clubhouse. Thanks to our main sponsor, Mannington Mills, we had a
keg of beer for all to partake. Most of the sailors were pretty
well spent, you could sense fatigue. Quickly, we must round them
up and give them sustenance. So dinner was eaten off the menu,
ok, you order from the menu and ate off a plate. Chef Jeff did a
fine job.
After dinner, Judd Lather who sails USA 48, Porcine
Accoutrements, posted results. Four boats were within a
point for first place. Quickly the powers to be had to think of
an alternate tie breaker. It came as a dream to a wise man, some
of you may call him . . . Chris Doyle! The tie breaker would be
whichever boat has the highest bar tab at night's end! It is at
this time that I must digress, for those of you who have never
attended this regatta it works like this: Friday night, you open
a bar tab for your boat. You drink on it Friday night and
Saturday night and then you pay it on Sunday! Most people are
overheard saying "Is that all!" as drinks at TBYC are favorably
priced.
Back to the fun. Pretty soon the crew of The Other White
Meat (minus the Canadian, I won't mention names Larry) were
taking an early lead on the bar tab tie breaker. Not to be out
done, Little Jerry Swinefeld orders the first of many
rounds of shots for the evening. Smarter than the average bear,
err pig, Mo' Bacon was lurking in the shadows, waiting
for one of their foes to falter. But where was Pork U,
Barb "I will win the party" Zars was nowhere to be found. She
snuck her boys back to the Bambi to make sure they got a good
rest. Will this be the move of the regatta, or can our heroes
back at the bar find something inside of the brown bottles that
can save them?
Sunday came awfully early. We woke to . . . dammit, sunshine,
again! Now, where did I put my shades, hat, whose T-shirt am I
wearing? As I pass along the dock, I see our fearless heroes
talking softly amongst themselves as they ease their boats out to
sea. They were a rough lot, but they all sported the determined
look of seasoned veterans who know they survived another night in
the Pig Pen, and the fact that someone had to have a cold beer
somewhere. Right?!
The wind was 14-18 knots, the sun was out, and there was no chop.
Our starting time was delayed slightly by fact that some of the
folks had no motor skills after the previous night. We got
started about 15 minutes late. The boys on Pork U had a
look of uninterrupted sleep as they barreled off the line. They
displayed height and speed on Sunday that no competitor could
match. They won the fifth race followed by Mo' Bacon,
Little Jerry Swinefeld, Bacon Beater and
The Other White Meat.
Race six was similar with Pork U showing the way. They
were followed by The Other White Meat, Don Thwing/Chris
Jacobson/Dave Corcoran on Pig Dirty, Little Jerry
Swinefeld, and I'd Rather be a Pig.
Our congratulations go out to Keith and Barbara Zars and their
team for winning the regatta. Great people, fun people!
Final results: the butcher, his
name is Keith Zars. He came from San Antonio, Texas. And pork
chops were on the menu!
This regatta went off without a hitch for the third year in a row.
I do not know how we get such great conditions in Tawas, but
somehow we do. Along with the great sailing, I must add the
people that take the time to come to Tawas from Youngstown (NY),
Cleveland (OH), Toronto (ON), Charlevoix (MI), San Antonio (TX),
and of course our own fleet in Tawas make this regatta the
greatest! Over the years we have made a lot of friends sailing
with all of you. What a riot it was to see all of you, and we,
the members of Tawas Bay Yacht Club and Tawas Bay J/22 Fleet #44
were honored to be your hosts!
Organizational announcement: on behalf of the members of Tawas
Bay Yacht Club and the participants we would like to thank the
following sponsors:
Mannington Mills
North Sails One Design
Hall Spars
Quantum Sails One Design
Layline
These companies continue to sponsor one design sailing here in
Tawas and around the country. Please send your business to them
whenever possible.
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